Laughing and Mindfulness!

What would it be like not to take ourselves so seriously? Sometimes we just need to laugh at ourselves a little bit.  And my mindfulness exercises this week gave me a great many reasons to laugh.  

So, one day this week I left my wallet at home.  The next day I left the phone.  The same day I went back to grab the phone and left the checkbook.  Today, finally, my entire purse looked like a bag lady’s mess but I seemed to have everything in it.  I came home after I was done with all my errands and did not have to back track once! I am proud of myself.  A good way to finish a week during which I reflected on mindfulness! Smiling and with a bit of a laugh!  Next week, I promise to do better!

Life is Amazing! Live Well.

Anna

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

Mindfulness and our wallets

This morning driving to work I was listening to Jean Chatzky on the Oprah and Friends radio  (yes, I am extravagant–I listen to satellite radio and it is not even commercial-free!)  She mentioned that some study had come out linking “sadness” to an “urge to spend” and that some people were more prone to the “spending to get a high” problem than others.  I think we all know that any purchase made under such circumstances is likely to provide a very short-lived high.  Then, if we are prone to such purchases, what can we do to stop ourselves?

What if we became mindful of why we are putting our hand on our wallet? What if we actually asked ourselves, what does that purchase do for me? If your running shoes have holes and you are buying new ones, obviously it’s the right time to acquire them! But if we are buying that extra lipstick, is the Glam Girl Red Color really going to change the way we feel?

I remember that right after September 11th the world seemed to have changed.  For me, the weird manifestation was that I did not feel right going out and shopping for anything.  It was a strange moment in time. Of course, life returned to normal–but I have tried to keep a level of awareness about the things that come into my life.  So,  what can you do today to be mindful about your wallet (other than carrying it with you in your purse? See my blog from yesterday!)?  Let me know.  I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Life is Amazing.  Live Well.

Anna

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

What a wallet can teach us

Running errands is nothing new–something we do a million times a day (or so it seems).  What was different today was meeting a friend at Starbucks and finding that my wallet was missing.  A moment of panic-I had four dollars with me, barely enough for a cup of coffee! And, of course, I had just driven around town without a license.  Panic and anxiety ensued.  Then I took a deep breath.  Where was the wallet? Did it drop out of my purse yesterday at the grocery store? More panic.  Focus, think.

And so the eureka moment came to me.  If I lived my life intentionally and mindfully, how could I not recollect what I had done with my wallet? Another deep breath.  And with the new breath I started to relax enough so I could think about what I had done yesterday.  I stopped my racing mind, which was telling me “See, you can’t even remember!”  And then, without leaving my Starbucks spot, my mind’s eye knew exactly where the wallet was.  Amazing.  I drove (again, without a license!) and returned home to pick up the wallet so I could feel better about having my documents and credit cards.  And with my friend at Starbucks, we talked about what we could learn about mindfulness today from the newly found wallet.

What would it take for you to stop and live mindfully? Take a deep breath and wonder! 
Life is Amazing! Live Well.

Anna Grassini

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

What does that really mean?

Language is such a special gift–each word and sentence can have different nuances, different meanings depending on who expresses them and their cultural context.  How easily we forget that each word can be received as a gift or as a punch.  Plus, as my friend Barbara Cave Henricks reminds me, “critics lurk at every door” and will look at our words with different eyes than we expected. (And Barbara should know, because she is in the publishing business–a fantastic writer herself, as well as a discriminating reader!)

 So you say something, thinking it has a particular meaning, but when you offer it up to the  world, you get surprised that the critics, lurking, take it to be something that was not what you meant.  What can you do now? What are your choices?

First, we talked about not to take things personally.  That’s a good start.  Second, consider whether your language needs refining.  Third, figure out how your words can affect others and even yourself.  If you stop to think about your words, you will find that they can pack a punch–more than you thought possible.  Become aware of your structures of interpretation and your use of language.

Want to explore more how to do just that? Hire a coach!

Life is Amazing! Live Well,

Anna

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

What if I did not take it personally?

Do you ever take things personally?  Fess up. Someone talks to you and the next thing you know your brain has gone in overdrive.  “I can’t believe she said that to me.  Doesn’t she know I am trying? How dare she not think that I am doing my job? I can’t believe she criticized me.  I can’t believe that she did this to me.”  And so on, until you melt in a pool of tears.

I do remember the first time my next door neighbor put a real estate sign indicating they were selling their home–with another real estate agent, no less!  How could they have done that to me? Did they not know that (at the time) I was in real estate as well? Did they not like me enough to owe me an interview for the job of selling their house? After all, if I was good enough to babysit their child on occasion, surely they could interview me to sell their house.  And so on and so forth–I took it very personally.  It felt like a slap on my face, and a major bruise on my ego! Then on a Sunday shortly thereafter, I walked over the lawn with my arms crossed and meaning business–I was going to check out who was this agent who had taken “My” business and had caused me such anguish. 

And there, in that moment the miracles started to happen.  The agent had taken the business for free (which I would not have done in a million years)! We started talking, I liked her.  I liked her company and, ultimately, I went to work in that very same company.  By crossing over the lawn, I had decided not to take things too personally–to be curious about what was going on.  And the doors started opening!

So what is the lesson in this story?  Sometimes we take things personally and we forget to take a deep breath.  What if you looked at the unfolding of events and started considering another perspective?  Maybe the person talking to us has a relative in the hospital and ten demands on their time, maybe the  the potential prospect has chosen another company or none at all because their circumstances have changed.  Maybe it was simply not our time to get praised while we were doing our job.  Who knows, the possibilities are endless. 

Want to change your perspective more? Working with a coach is the ideal way to look at things in a different way, designing a life that is exactly what you want. 

Life is Amazing! Live Well.

Anna

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

A little habit

What would it take to change your life just a little bit? What would happen if you added to your day one new habit…maybe something as small as remembering to smile to yourself in the mirror when you are brushing your teeth, waking up and spending the first minute of the day thinking something great and positive, resting comfortably on a chair for a few minutes with nobody pulling at you? What if at work you took a deep breadth before you started a new project? 

If you want to improve your life, you will have to let go of some old habits and you will have to start some new ones.  Nothing like a day at a time, a small habit at a time.  This is not novel thinking on my part–just a reminder that some things may not be earth shattering, but they may still make a difference in our days…

If you would like a form to help you create ten delicious daily habits, just contact me!

Life is Amazing! Live Well.

Anna

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

Where shall I bloom today?

Spring is just around the corner–and I woke up today after a major clean up of our bedroom. It has not looked so spacious and uncluttered since we moved in 11 years ago, if ever.  As I took in this “new space” I wondered–what can we prune in our lives so that we may bloom today? Look at your desk, your laundry room, the car…is there a small corner that you would like to declutter today? What is draining your energy? What can you clear that will enable your energy to soar?

Look around and take 15 minutes to create a small square inch of space that feels good.  And then let me know, how did your experiment work? What did it do for you? Are you blossoming?

 Life is Amazing! Live Well!
Anna

www.lifeinbalancecoach.com

What do I need?

When is the last time  you actually sat down and took stock of what your needs are? It may be the case that you have long ignored what your needs are, but that does not mean they have gone away.  According to Thomas Leonard, one of the early pioneers of the coaching profession, unmet needs cause a lot of pressures.  Can an unmet need drain you of your energy? Hold you back from creating something amazing in your life. Leonard defines needs as “what you must have to be you.”  If you accept his definition, whe you meet your needs, you become free to be the best you can be.  What an alluring possibility.

So today, spend some time thinking–are needs something that essential to me? What is one my most precious needs? Do I need to feel appreciated? Loved? Wanted? Accomplished? Be correct? Fullfilled? Nurtured? Nurturing? Once you have thought about your need, then ask yourself what how you could accomplish more if you had this particular need met. 

Having trouble finding your needs? Discuss it with a personal coach or brainstorm with a buddy to see if you can come up with a list.  And then get to work to satisfy your need–you will be surprised by what you can accomplish once your need is met!

Life is Amazing! Live Well.

Anna

What I Am Reading Now

I used to belong to a book club that we called the “Book Cover Club”: if we had seen the cover of the book, we were welcome to come for the evening.  The book club has long dissolved, but I am an avid reader so my passion for books keeps going.  Looking at this blog it occurred to me last night that we could have our very own”virtual book club” to share  some good books that have enriched our lives recently.    Maybe you’ll find time to read with me and let me know your thoughts–and maybe you will give me suggestions on what to read next.  I have to say that I am no Oprah (you wish) but I did read Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman’s Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia long before it was a bestseller thanks to the recommendation of a friend and long before it had landed on Oprah!  So please, jump in!This month I have been enjoying See Jane Lead: 99 Ways for Women to Take Charge at Work. Although the author is not represented by the world’s best publicist, Barbara Cave Henricks (see her blog at www.cavehenricks.com to find some really good business books), I shall forgive the author this one flaw since I rather enjoyed her clear writing and her helpful pointers.  Whether you are currently involved in your school PTA, leading a team at work, or running your own company, I think you might just find something useful in this book.  Don’t forget to take the introductory test to figure out what some of your leadership strengths may be–you can then jump into chapters that describe those strengths or you can do what I did: read the book from front to back!  Either way you will find some practical suggestions you can use.  I loved the chapter on being strategic–it was a revelation for me to find out how strategic I am, without even knowing it consciously!Happy reading and I hope you will find something useful as well! Life is Amazing! Live Well,Anna

How can I live differently today?

What if today you woke up and, while you work, you made a conscious effort to live “one action” through the day? Take a verb and see what it would be like to carry it out through the day.

Here are some ideas:

Celebrate, Connect, Collaborate, Empower, Promote, Develop, Change, Solve, Reach, Galvanize, Transform, Feel, Own, Live, Play, Sing, Thank